Poor old Mum passed away 31st Dec 2008 aged nearly 97. She defied the odds for 2 years with the help love and support of Moors Park Residential Home near Teignmouth but in the end her body could do no more.
I spent some time with her as it was obvious we were on a slippery slope and managed to say all those things to her in her last few days that really should have been said to her on a weekly basis. When she finally went, staff members at the Home cried with me.
The funeral was 22nd Jan because I wanted the same lady funeral director to do the necessary and she had been away. She really is a gem and if anyone is thinking of getting buried in the near future then T. Clarks in Teignmouth are the number one choice.
The night before the funeral I took over most of a hotel for family and cousins for a sort of Last Supper and it was just amazing to have around me everybody I love in one lump.
The funeral was to me an emotional experience I shall never forget. Even people I did not know were visibily affected by the excellence of the words of the new Vicar and I had a lovely West Indian solo singer to sing "Teach me thy way O'Lord"; and if an angel was singing then that was she. I was seriously in need of a life jacket after that as wept uncontrollably.
And so Pusser is now an orphan. My parents were hard working, staunch supporters of the Royal Family, gave masses away to charity, did good deeds on almost a daily basis but their biggest test in this world I fear was me. They have absolute quality friends absolutely covering the world and cards and donations have come flooding in from all sources.
So can I live up to my parents high standards? No chance. All I can do is admire, even envy their uncluttered, gadget free lifestyle, their ability to love others unconditionally and I fear it was me that broke the mould and now where will the world go when all this generation has gone.
So sad to read your news. Our thoughts are with both you and your family. It sounds like you gave her a great send off.
The death of my mum hit me more strongly than the death of my father, or any other family member. I have some idea of the sense of loss you're feeling.
I don't know what to say, Pusser, but somehow, as you often do, you have managed to raise a smile in the post, despite the sad news of your mum passing away.
You have our sympathy Pusser,Sharon and I have been through the same situation and I don't think it ever really sinks in that your dear mum is no longer around.
The funeral sounds like it was a celebration of her life with all your close family around which is how it should be.
I also had similar pangs of guilt to you,thinking about all the problems that I had caused her,but they soon faded as I,like you,was also able to talk meaningfully before she died.Now I can look back and smile at all the happy memories,hopefully,in time,so can you.
______________________________________________________________ cheers Steve
I'm sad for you Puss, but pleased that you "managed to say all those things to her in her last few days ". I did the same with my Mum, by lucky happenstance just the evening before on my own with her, and it really helped me deal with it.
______________________________________________________________ My life has been akin to floating on an airbed on calm waters. Ocasionally interupted by a Tsunami
Hi Pusser, words cannot convey the sadness we feel for you, nor will words help you feel better.
One thing you don't mention, in your typical understated amusing style is the amount o effort that you did put into getting to see you Mum on a vry regular basis! Taxis, hire cars, motorhomes, breakfasts stuck in a garden centre that became so regular to you, you started treating it like home and inviting people over for breakfast!
You may have been a trial when you were younger, but no man could have made a better effort that you have in the last couple of years that I have known you
Condolences, Pusser. It's a difficult time, losing the parents. My Mum died over 20 years ago, and would have been so proud of what we and her grandchildren have done, and of course would have loved to have seen the great grandchildren!
______________________________________________________________ Still sat at my desk most of the time, although I may be using the laptop in the lounge or even on the sofa in Stella2, but not at the wheel of Stella2
Bognormike - the only motorhoming Oxford United supporter in Bognor
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