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An elderly Irishman went into a bar. With great difficulty, the Irishman hoisted his bad leg over the barstool, pulled himself up painfully, and asked for a sip of Irish whiskey.
The Irishman looked towards the end of the bar and said, "Is that Jesus
down there?"
The bartender nodded, so the Irishman told him to give Jesus an Irish
whiskey, too.
The next patron to come in was an ailing Italian with a hunched back, he
shuffled up to the barstool and asked for a glass of Chianti. He looked down the bar and asked if that was Jesus sitting at the end of the bar.
The bartender nodded, so the Italian said to give Him a glass of Chianti, too.
The third patron to enter the bar was a Scouser, who swaggered into the bar and yelled, "Barkeeper, gis us a lager dere la! Hey, is dat God' s Boy down dere?"
The barkeeper nodded, so the Scouser told him to give Jesus a lager too.
As Jesus got up to leave, he walked over to the Irishman and touched him
and said, " For your kindness, you are healed!"
The Irishman felt the strength comeback to his leg, so he got up and danced a jig out the door.
Jesus went up and touched the Italian and said, " For your kindness, you are healed!"
The Italian felt his back straighten, so he raised his hands
above his head and did a flip out the door.
Jesus then walked towards the Scouser, but the Scouser jumped back and
exclaimed, Don't F****** touch me! I'm on disability allowance!
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